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Wednesday
Jun112008

When a vacation is not a vacation

We just returned from a month in Europe, seeing friends and family, touring small villages, hiking in the mountains, going to the beach. But it wasn't really a vacation. At least not what I used to call a vacation. When I looked up the definition of a vacation in various dictionaries, there are invariably two interpretations. One is that a vacation is a respite or a break. The other is that it is time away from work or school. I guess I always viewed an ideal vacation as being both of those. A time to relax, clear my mind, put up my feet. And also time away from the daily grind.

This vacation did not fit that full definition of a vacation for me. It definitely wasn't a respite. In fact work is a respite in comparison with this vacation. I spent pretty much 24 hours per day with my two children. We were staying with my in-laws, so they were able to entertain the kids sometimes, especially the older one, but generally whenever they were doing that, I was trying to get something else done. Take a shower. Make the dinner. Do the laundry. Pay the bills (yes....even on vacation that has to happen). Trying not to be a horrible houseguest all of the time. And when I was taking care of the kids, I didn't get to put my feet up. We were never in an area that was sufficiently childproofed that I could just let them go and do as they pleased. And of course they were overjoyed to have Mommy there and wanted to play with me all the time. On top of that, we had visiting friends (one with a child with chicken pox that I had to keep the baby away from) and family to entertain and sights to see. Not to mention the fact that any stress relief and relaxing that I did get on this vacation was quickly undone by an 8 hour flight with 2 kids, with a 3 hour drive tacked on to either end of the flight. They were extremely well behaved on the plane, but it is still a long and difficult journey.

Am I disappointed? No. I knew this is what it would be like.

Would I do it again? Of course. But why?

  • This trip gave me an amazing opportunity to reconnect with my kids. As a working mom, it often feels like I hardly see them and when I do see them it is just rushing through the things that have to get done as part of our daily routine. On this trip, I got to spend some real quality time with my kids. As exhausting as that was, it really helped us to reconnect.

  • My kids got to spend quality time with family members that they don't see often. They got to play with their grandparents and even their great-grandmother. They got to see their aunt and uncle that they don't see often. They got to see great aunts and uncles, close friends and their children, and other people that are important to us and to them.

  • They got some intensive exposure to their second, third and fourth languages (German, French and Spanish) and got to see that these aren't just strange languages that we speak at home or at school. These are real languages that people use to communicate and some of them only speak one of those languages.

  • They got to see and experience things that were exciting and interesting to them and that broadened their minds and understanding of the world.


So while this trip wasn't relaxing, it was important in many ways. But now I need a vacation from the vacation. I'm looking forward to my lunch breaks when I go back to work next week. They'll be my mini-vacation to tide me over until my next real vacation.
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Reader Comments (1)

Wow, what an adventure! (No chickenpox for your little ones?) I hope you have a vacation from the vacation lined up. :-)

Beth Blair

August 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDesertMama
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