A guest post and another popularity contest

Image credit: brianna.lehman on flickr

Guest post: Can Mama Bear Let Go?

Arwyn at Raising my Boychick has been hosting an ongoing Womanist/Feminist Parenting Primer (WFPP) with guest posts on a variety of fascinating topics and situations faced by a variety of different mothers. This week it is my turn and I wrote about my experience being an attached mom who goes off to work each day and leaves her children in her partner's care.  My post is called Can Mama Bear Let Go? Here is a brief excerpt:

A baby develops a connection to its mother as it grows in the womb. That connection is reinforced as the mother holds the baby to her breast for the first time and then over and over again. Biology and society place the mom as the primary caregiver for new life...But increasingly, people are realizing that despite this strong biological connection and despite society’s assumptions about a mother’s role, the birth mother does not have to take on the lion’s share of the nurturing and caregiving. Whether the parents choose equally shared parenting, whether the birth mother is the primary breadwinner, or whether the non-birth mother chooses to induce lactation to share in the primary care duties, there are many scenarios where mama bear…the one who carried and birthed that baby…may need to let go. If we want to achieve the goals of feminism, we need to not only ask for more options for mothers, but also ask their partners to step up and be more than a babysitter. But we need to give them the space to do that. We mama bears need to be willing to let go a bit.

Go over and read the whole post to find out how I have managed to let go without it tearing me apart. My husband would say it is easy because work is like a vacation compared with taking care of the kids. There may be some truth to that (some of the time), but I think there is more to it than that. I'm sure there will be some fascinating discussion in the comments over there too. There always is.

Popularity Contest: Babble asks who they missed

A while ago I told you about Mom101's great list of top 50 mommybloggers who didn’t make the Babble top 50 mommybloggers list and are probably more fun anyway. Turns out someone at Babble realized too that they missed a few people along the way, so they created a page for people to Add a Favourite Mommy Blogger and then for people to vote up their favourites. To whoever nominated me and whoever has voted for me so far, thank you! If anyone else likes my blog and feels like stroking my ego, you can go and vote for me there. If you do decide to vote for me, please find the existing entry (I'm at about #38 on the list right now) and click "I like this blogger" rather than filling in the form at the top of the page. They seem to have a problem with weeding out the duplicates when the same blog gets added more than once.  While the votes and recognition are appreciated and will hopefully give others who don't know about my blog the opportunity to learn about it, what really means the most to me is your visits here, your comments, your links back to my posts with your own spin on it. That is what keeps me going, not one popularity contest or another.

Comments

[Jen]

Thanks for clearing up the whole Babble thing. I was so confused! I'm going now to click on "I like this blogger" YOU.

[Postpartum Progress]

It's funny, because last year they also did the "Nominate Your Favorite" and I was in the 20s/30s on that list pretty much all year long (thank you, thank you readers!), but I didn't make the Babble 50 this year. I just say that because I hope people don't worry too much about being among the top 50 of Nominate Your Favorite this year thinking that it will put them on the Babble Top 50 list next year. It won't. I think it's just a way for Babble to see who's out there. ;-)

[phdinparenting]

Yes, to see who is out there and to add them to their spam list as well.