Friday
Mar272009
Delurking and Open Thread Weekend
Friday, March 27, 2009
Come out, come out, wherever you are....
photo credit: olaerik on flickr
The next few days are going to be insanely busy and I probably won't have time to put up any more new posts until I start my Carnival of Play on April 1 (you can still sign up to participate).
Until then, I'm turning it over to you.
You see, every day hundreds of people visit my blog. Sure, many of them come in from search engines and only look at the one post they landed on and then never come back. But a lot of people do come back, over and over again, and I really appreciate that. But most of them never leave a comment. And that's fine. I know not everyone wants to jump in and comment. But I'm curious. Will you satisfy my curiosity for me, just this once? Pretty please?
I'd love it if my lurkers could drop me a comment and maybe tell me a little something...whatever you want really...but if you want a question to answer, pick one (or all) of these:
To my regular commenters...you're great! You are what keeps me going. You inspire me. And I'd love you to drop a comment here too.
:)
Thanks for reading everyone!
photo credit: olaerik on flickr
The next few days are going to be insanely busy and I probably won't have time to put up any more new posts until I start my Carnival of Play on April 1 (you can still sign up to participate).
Until then, I'm turning it over to you.
You see, every day hundreds of people visit my blog. Sure, many of them come in from search engines and only look at the one post they landed on and then never come back. But a lot of people do come back, over and over again, and I really appreciate that. But most of them never leave a comment. And that's fine. I know not everyone wants to jump in and comment. But I'm curious. Will you satisfy my curiosity for me, just this once? Pretty please?
I'd love it if my lurkers could drop me a comment and maybe tell me a little something...whatever you want really...but if you want a question to answer, pick one (or all) of these:
- Tell me a bit about yourself
- Tell me why you read my blog
- Tell me what you would like me to blog about in the future
- Tell me about your blog and why I should read it
- Tell me what's on your mind regarding parenting
- Tell me which post you loved the most
- Tell me which post you hated the most
- Tell me how you found my blog
- Tell me what I should change about my blog
- Tell me what you love about being a parent
- Tell me what you hate about being a parent
- Give me ideas for how I should celebrate my one year bloggiversary in May
To my regular commenters...you're great! You are what keeps me going. You inspire me. And I'd love you to drop a comment here too.
:)
Thanks for reading everyone!
Reader Comments (34)
I've really been enjoying your blog. I came through from a message in Twitter about breastfeeding and I've been reading for awhile now. Thanks!
I found your blog via a comment you left on my breastfeeding post. THANK YOU for commenting! So glad I followed you over here! Mind if I add you to my blogroll?? What a wealth of resources you've got here!
P.S. Now I'm worried about the fact that I've stopped pumping! I left a response to your comment about the topic.
@ C: I'd love for you to add me to your blogroll! Thanks!
@ Tamara: Thanks for your comment!
Hi there -- Desiree Fawn from sofawned.com here. I've been following you on twitter for a while & reading your posts! I think perhaps I found you through Ann Douglas? Though I could be mistaken :)
Hi!
I actually just found your blog recently, and enjoying the fresh and educated take on parenting.
The thing I love and hate about parenting has to be how intense it can be. I've never felt more alive than when I am with my girls, living in the moment, but man, some days I just need to turn the dial down. Luckily the littlest is finally at an age where I can take a break and know that she isn't wailing the entire time I am gone, so I can go away, and then come back and be excited to be here with them again.
I also am affiliated with API... so I think thats how I found you.
I found you on Twitter and have been reading for a little while. I think I have commented a couple of times. I read your blog b/c I also embrace a lot of AP philosophies and have a keen interest in many of the topics you cover.
Don't change anything :-) I like what you're writing about!
What I love about parenting are the challenges and the uncertainty of each new day.
What I hate about parenting are the challenges and the uncertainty of each new day!
Something on my mind re parenting is finding a career/mothering balance and finding affordable enough childcare for three kids so that I can actually go back to work!!
I found you through... Not sure. Sometime last summer. I think it was the airline posts. And I love your blog. Part of me has thought, "You know? I could stop blogging and just redirect all my readers to PhD." lol
I try to send people your way often on FB and such.
As my daughter gets older, I'm getting interested in various gentle discipline options and ideas. I think I'll go through your old posts for ideas.
I have two little ones - a 28 month daughter and 8 month son. I found your blog through searching about sleep training when I was trying to remind myself that it wasn't in line with my parenting priorities when I was overwhelmed and exhausted with my little guy. (Thankfully, those days have since resolved!)
I continue to read because I think your ideas are interesting. Not everything works for me (especially with regards to breastfeeding - I have insufficient glandular tissue, so I combo fed and switched to formula early on for both of mine. I tend to gloss over those posts because I have my own mommy guilt issues in that area...) but I am always learning new ideas for things like gentle discipline that help me when I fall short of my ideals, etc.
My favorite and least favorite parts of parenting are that they change and develop rapidly, always keeping me on my toes! But that's why I come to places like this, to learn new ideas to handle the new challenges.
@Anji - Wow! Thanks for answering all of the questions. *wave* thanks for delurking!
@Jennifer - Nice to hear that the anti-sleep-training stuff had a positive effect on someone. I get so many complaints about it, so it is nice to have some positive feedback too.
@TopHat - Thanks for referring people to me. I appreciate it! Please don't stop blogging though...there is power and safety in numbers. Also, you present a different perspective than I have on things like birth and religion, so while we have a lot in common, there are intriguing differences too!
@Shannon - I hear you on the what you hate/love about parenting. I often feel that way too...loving and hating the same thing at the same time. It is an emotional rollercoaster sometimes.
@Naomi - I love being part of the API community! Nice to see you here too.
@ivymae - Thanks for delurking. Nice to meet you! :)
@ Desiree Fawn - Thanks for stopping by. I think you are right...it was through Ann Douglas that we connected on twitter.
You should read room704.us because it's only, like, THE most awesome blog created in the last month and a half.
So says me.
Snort.
De-lurking is tough, especially because I feel like such a novice parent sometimes, and you seem to have all of the answers. (Even though I totally understand as a grown up that you are probably in situations all the time when you feels as unsure as I do, but it doesn't make me any less intmidated.)
So anyway, I think I found you on Twitter, but I don't remember the exact circumstances. I love your blog because your choices almost always make sense to me, and you often help me to figure out my out my own thoughts about things.
How's that for delurking?:)
I'm Amber, mother of 14 month old J. I'm not sure how I initially found your blog, maybe kellymom forums? Anyhow, I'm starting up blogging myself so not only am I looking for parenting advice, but would love to get any insights you have as an experienced "mommy blogger".
Thanks,
Amber
@VDog - Thanks for telling me about your new blog. I'll check it out for sure.
@Tara - Please don't be intimidated. As you said, there are plenty of situations where I am unsure, where I don't or can't do what I think is best. I don't write about those often. I think it goes back to the purpose of this blog that I stated when I started it. I wanted to share the things I learned/figured out, even if I haven't mastered them, because writing about things is the way that I learn, the way that things sink in for me. I see my blog as my study notes. It has become much more than that and I use it for a lot of advocacy around parenting issues now too, but when it comes to parenting tips and solutions, I'm really learning with you...
@Amber - Thanks for delurking! Maybe I'll do a mommy blogger tips post at some point...I'll put that on my ideas list. Thanks!
I'm Jackie, 32, mom to 7 month old Evie...I came across your blog after you commented on one of my posts on Kellymom, so thank you. I am a SAHM, but previously worked as a domestic violence counselor/educator. I was so pleased to come across your blog, I have been lurking for a couple of months now. I find your posts to be very thought provoking and inspiring. I have been particularly interested in your posts on gender issues and values (I am looking forward to your review on parenting beyond belief as I am reading it as well). There have been no posts that I hated...I have found the ones that I have read to be very inspiring. I don't have too many friends who share my parenting philosopy, so it is nice to read about issues that I too care about and think about in terms of parenting decisions I will make. I think the thing I love the most about being a parent is how very very lucky I feel to be able to spend my day with my beautiful angel and how truly, deeply happy I am when I am with her ( I never knew I had it in me to feel this level of happiness) the thing I hate the most is the worry.
LOL! Ooops!
* Tell me a bit about yourself
MWJ-- mama of a 2 year old boy... hubby's gone for work most of the year... AP... nursing... potty learning... working FT... about to graduate with my master's degree.
* Tell me why you read my blog
We agree on a lot of issues and your blog gives me new ideas and is great for an additional resource on areas I can't cover on my blog.
* Tell me what you would like me to blog about in the future
Discipline!
* Tell me about your blog and why I should read it
I'm witty. Kidding. I blog about AP, environment, politics...hot button topics, but near and dear to my heart. Read me because I'm beautiful. Kidding again.
* Tell me what’s on your mind regarding parenting
Potty learning! One week down, and we're good at it! LOL!
I'm skipping some...
* Tell me what you love about being a parent
Hugs and kisses from The Boy. Pure love!
* Tell me what you hate about being a parent
Discipline!
* Tell me a bit about yourself
I'm a doctoral candidate in statistics and also the mother of a 2-year-old. So, I'm not actually getting my PhD in parenting, but I sometimes think I deserve one.
* Tell me why you read my blog
I wish I had time to do formal research into parenting practices, so that I could choose one that was associated with the outcomes I really want. Since I spend my time on statistics research instead, I'm glad that you do the research for me!
* Tell me what you would like me to blog about in the future
I'd like to hear more about discipline and education for slightly older children - especially some more information about the effects of praise. (I've read one book by Alfie Kohn, but I suspect there is more debate out there.)
* Tell me about your blog and why I should read it
I don't have a statistics blog yet (though I plan to, soon). However, I do have a website (http://statnotes. net) with information about statistics and related subjects that is useful for people using undergraduate and graduate level statistics/economics/math.
* Tell me what I should change about my blog
No need to change! I really enjoy it!
* Tell me what you love about being a parent
Toddler-isms (most recently, "I've been workin' on the rainbow"). The excitement that children have about mundane things.
* Tell me what you hate about being a parent
Sometimes, I would like to do other things or do things on my own schedule and at my own convenience. Sadly, it doesn't work that way.
Thanks for writing!
I'm a semi-regular commenter so you already know about me but I found you through the Mothering forums on a blogging thread. I'm 29 with two children, nearly 3 (this week!) and 6 months. I do freelance writing and editing from home but in a previous life I worked in marketing and campaigns for the non-profit sector.
I especially love your posts on babywearing, breastfeeding, potty learning and gentle discipline and most all the other ones too. I disagree with your angle ocassionally but never your overall message.
I like the clean, simple lines of your blog and that there's not a bunch of clutter, ads and buttons. I also like the easily-accessible and organised archives.
I love watching my children learn and grow as individuals and how they relate to the world. It gives me great joy to supervise their upbringing. However, the constraints and loneliness of being their full-time primary caregiver can be overwhelming and frustrating sometimes and that is my least favourite part of parenting.
Some issues I would like to see you address more is how an AP parent can learn to deal with parenting-related anger in an appropriate way and more about healthy food choices for kids and how one can make sure their kids are getting a healthy, balanced diet.
Thanks for the time you put into your thoughtful posts, Annie, I really appreciate them.
Well, I left a comment once before...so I'm not sure if I qualify, but I thougth I'd answer anyway!
I'm a mum of four; three boys, on girl. Their ages are 7, 5, 3, and 1. My blog is relatively new but I am really enjoying blogging.
I think I found you on twitter first.
I love your blog. There are two reasons I don't comment very often (on your blog and others); one, often I'm just sitting her nodding with not much to add except maybe: "I totally agree!" Two, when I do have something to say usually don't have the time to write out a thoughtful response.
For your one year bloggiversary I'd love to see a blog post that talks about your year; why you blog; the positive and the negative; how blogging has changed you; tell us about some really great people you've met by blogging; make it a tell-all! You've probably accumulated some interesting stories over the past year and oh ya, why did you start blogging in the first place? That's my big idea :).
Amanda
I am always pottering around, can't remember when I first visited though, seems like ages ago! I have been very lax commenting lately as my crazy toddler limits my online time, but I am still reading and nodding along :)
Tell me a bit about yourself - I'm 32 years old, and a mother of two amazing boys - 3 and a half and 1 years old. They are my entire life and everyday with them in amazing. And tiring. And wonderful. I work in the gov't as a writer/editor/comms advisor. I love to write and to read!
Tell me why you read my blog - Very educational! A great blog that I stumbled across, and I will be back!
Tell me what you would like me to blog about in the future - guilt feelings that mom have; for instance, the guilt I have at returning to work sometimes, or the fact that hubby gets to spend more one on one time with our eldest son while I take care of baby. Hard to divide the time, you know? And about how to get a child to start school...
Tell me about your blog and why I should read it - My blog is ver real; I talk about my children, my fears, my experiences, and the things I do; I love to hear from other people as well; I love finding new blogs and hope others find some entertainment in my blog, as well!
Tell me what’s on your mind regarding parenting - How can I worry less? We went through a rough time with our 3 year old; he had pneumonia a few months ago that was so serious, he was in the children's hospital for over two weeks, with IV. And he required surgery, a chest tube, etc. It was incredibly hard to go through that, and for someone who worries as much asI do - it just made my day to day worry about my kids even worse. I want to worry less! And I've never been able to say NO. How can I say NO and have my kids still LOVE ME? I feel like if I disciple them, they will not love their mommy anymore! (Yes I need help!)
Tell me which post you loved the most - I have not read enough to comment on that, but will do so shortly!
Tell me how you found my blog - Can't remember... through another fellow blogger... or Twitter...
Tell me what I should change about my blog - Nothing!
Tell me what you love about being a parent - Everything... well, except the constant worry. And the lack of sleep. I love that I created two perfect little people with my husband. I love each and every stage they go through. One stage, cuter then the next; I love their smiles, the way they smell, their voices, the way they hug me or get happy to see me, and I love having conversations with my oldest son. Listening to him talk is just AMAZING. Watching his little brother try to do everything his older brother does is also amazing and very funny. I love them in a way that words cannot describle! They are my entire life!
Tell me what you hate about being a parent - The tiredness. The lack of sleep, the worry, the never ending houseword, the worry, the worry... the fact that people without kids have NO IDEA what a rough night is all about, or what being TIRED really is, or what real love is all about... I think once you are a parent, you're in a whole other world, and I sometimes feel disconnected from my non-mom friends.
Give me ideas for how I should celebrate my one year bloggiversary in May - Celebarte your achievement with a nice vacation?
Just landed on your blog through Feministing, then Hoyden About Town via the reviews of the Atlantic Monthly breastfeeding article. Love what I've seen so far. Posts on balancing priorities/activities & how you split your time are of great interest. No comments to add really since I'm not a parent yet, but hubby and I are in the planning stages.
Have commented a couple of times, but I am amazed that you've been blogging for less than a year!
Such a short time to accumulate the wealth of material here!
I'm a dad in the UK with three boys born 03, 05 & 07 who are fortunate to have a stay-at-home mum whose parenting I cannot equal. Our parenting has evolved from novices looking to fit a baby into our lives, to parents who think doing the best for our kids means giving plenty of time, contact and love.
I'm a mom to 10 month old Sophie - I think I found this when I googled sleep-training because like someone else said, it's not something I want to do, but was at the end of my rope at the time. I agree with a lot of what you say, we are co-sleeping, baby-wearing, cloth-diapering folk.
we do continue to struggle with some sleep issues though - try to put her down in her crib then move her to the bed with us when she wakes after we go to bed - but often she wakes an hour after going down and won't go back to bed on her own so I have to go to bed early, which I'm not down with... oh well. we keep trying.
I love your non-confrontational tone that you have with people you disagree with - you are always even-tempered and logical.
I just recently found you on twitter (cjengo36). I am catching up on your blod, but as an avid blogger myself I enjoy your writing. I am also a parent of a normal healthy ten year old, and a new baby that had a stroke. I confront medical issues, and more on a daily basis. Seeing how my life no longer follows the path of normal parenting I am always interested in reading about others, advice, and more.
http://cjengo.blogspot.com/
Jennifer
Hey there I'm Mel. I'm a UK mother of two, a 3 year old girl and a 4 month old boy. I got the name PrettySprinkles while baking and decorating fairy cakes with my daughter.
I want to be the best parent I can be so spend a lot of time reading around various parenting topics, most recently breastfeeding (because I've been doing a lot of it since my wee boy was born). Hence how I came across this blog. My next challenge is potty training - it's late I know but my daughter is scared of everything so we have to do things at her speed. She knows when she has been wee in her nappy and sometimes asks for the potty so it's a start. Any tips welcomed.
The thing I hate about being a parent is thinking I'm doing ok and then having my confidence smashed by someone or other (usually our Health Visitor or GP). The best bit is when they look you straight in the eye and smile at you - nothing on earth like it.
The kids smiling not the health visitor or doctor (but you knew that already - I hope)
I'm the mother of a one-year-old boy, and I came to your blog through a Google search on CIO. I have an all-night nurser, and I just really don't want to do CIO and needed some info to give my husband to support my position and wanted to read more to remind me why I'm OK taking this no-CIO route (people would lead you to believe you're ruining your child by allowing such an organic approach to sleep and nursing--even fairly "natural" parenting types). Anyway, you had great info on CIO, and I'm going to keep returning for your regular posts.
Baby awakes . . .
I'm a bit late in posting, but I do read frequently...
* Tell me a bit about yourself
I'm a working mom (scientist) and wife of a stay at home dad. We have two kids - 3 and 7 months. Homebirthing, AP, etc.
* Tell me why you read my blog
Your posts are so well thought out and organized! ;) I feel like a learn a lot from the things you say. Posts make me think, etc. The amount of thought and study that you put into your parenting is an inspiration. I also appreciate your perspective on life-work balance.
* Tell me what you would like me to blog about in the future
More about life-work balance. Being a spouse of a SAHD. Discipline. Siblings. Teaching toddlers to share. Spirited children.
* Tell me about your blog and why I should read it
My blog is pretty rambling. Just me thoughts on life, parenting, life-work balance (or lack there of), etc.
* Tell me what’s on your mind regarding parenting
life-work balance. trying to spend more time with me kids. and raise kids who are good people and good to the earth.
* Tell me how you found my blog
through Kellymom
* Tell me what you love about being a parent
the kids. ;)
* Tell me what you hate about being a parent
I wouldn't say "hate". But the lack of sleep is hard, and the lack of time for myself.
* Give me ideas for how I should celebrate my one year bloggiversary in May
This is a bit "late," but I don't get to your site every day. I know how much delurking has meant to me as a blogger so I thought I'd say hello.
I'm a stay at home mom to three boys ages 7, 5 and 2 1/2. We are currently in the WAIT part of adoption, hoping to soon be matched with a little baby of any gender and any race (domestic adoption).
I can't remember whose blog it was that directed me to yours, but as soon as I clicked over I knew this was a site to bookmark.
I love the topics of baby wearing, breastfeeding, parenting little ones with respect, and more. I've explored a little bit on my own blog the topics of breastfeeding and nighttime parenting. Hence the enjoyment of reading your blog, which expands (with thoughtfulness and intelligence) on topics of interest to me.
What I love about being a parent?
The amazing things my kids say and do: they're so intelligent!
What I hate about being a parent?
The maxed out problem: it creeps up on me and all of a sudden I'm thinking, "I QUIT!"
About my blog:
It's a major conglomeration of family stuff, home education stuff, thoughts on Christianity, breastfeeding education, recipes, and more. Why should you read it? I think only if it contains something of interest to you. I rather envy bloggers who have set up a blog with a specific focus. Mine is very hodge podge. But so is my life right now, and that's okay.
I think you asked more questions but that's all I have time for at present. Looking forward to reading whatever you post on in the coming months.
-Carole
I have an 18 mo son and if I remember correctly I found you when desperate for sleep and looking for support/tips/tricks/answers/WHATEVER. I've hung around because I really appreciate the amount of research you put into your responses and your insistence on respectful discourse (among the comments). I also share many of your beliefs about kids and parents, so that makes it more fun to read what's going on in your neck of the woods.
I blog about my life and the transition to SAHMhood. It's a little helter-skelter, but I think it's reflective of the current state of things, such as they are: woman quits money-earning job, woman has identity crisis, feels guilt, doubts self, etc., etc. I try to thread a common idea throughout that we CAN find meaning IN our lives, as opposed to OUT of it via a paycheck. Dunno if I actually succeed at that. - I also think it's downright obscene that in the US a woman is granted 6-8 weeks of protected, paid leave to birth a child. (I've got posts upon posts in my big fat brain working on that topic alone). I also blog about nesting/design, cooking/food, tips and being green. Basically all the things that are on my radar any given moment.
I dig your blog layout, etc. A little blog critique would only be re: organization (I wish mine was where I wanted it, too). I'd like to be able to search your site by age issues, for example.
The thing I love most about being a parent is that it makes every breath I take meaningful in a new way. The thing I hate is that... well, I don't really "hate" anything, although I do find sorting the deluge of info out there pretty daunting.
To celebrate your 1-year anniversary, you could do what I'm gonna do. Write an ode. To what? Who knows. Whatever!
Ok, it's weird admitting I'm a lurker, but I am on your site, especially. I'm a more shoot-from-your-hip sorta gal and I find some of the discussions a little intense (I enjoy reading them, though) and I don't always think I can contribute. But thanks for giving me the chance to pop in!
Jessica
[...] also been busy and haven’t had a ton of time to write. Last year at this time, I did a delurking and open thread post and encouraged people who read the blog, but don’t get around to commenting, to come out and [...]
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