The Tortoise and the Hare

Anyone with more than one child knows what it feels like to be pulled in two directions. The baby needs a diaper change and the older child wants a drink. The baby needs to nurse and the older child wants to play a game. The older child needs his bum wiped and the baby wants to be held. One kid wants to go to the park and the other one wants to go to the bookstore. One wants to read the Dr. Seuss book and the other one wants to read the Sesame Street book. That's frustrating and difficult to deal with, but par for the course when you have more than one child.

What has been getting to me lately is the different speeds at which they do the same activity.

My son takes his time eating, dawdles, fiddles, does everything but eat and is always the last one finished a meal. My daughter is already saying "all done" before I've gotten two bites of my own dinner down and then proceeds to throw her food around the room if not let down from her high chair immediately. If we are out somewhere taking a walk, my daughter likes to stop to look at every flower, look in every window, feel the grass, pick up stones. My son wants to speed ahead and yells for us to go faster and catch up. At bath time, one wants to get in and get out and the other wants to stay and play. When reading a book, one wants to look at all of the pictures and ask questions and the other one wants to turn the pages as fast as possible.

Things were so much easier when my daughter was still an exclusively breastfed sling baby. Now, I feel torn and pulled in two directions. I feel like I'm coaching the Tortoise and the Hare.

Comments

[Cynthia]

That must be hard.

[jessyz]

I had never thought of that, but I guess it must be really hard. Good luck to you. I am sort of glad I still have only one little one.

[Lindsay]

I think this is one of the things I'm most worried about when I have a second little one. How will I meet both of their needs when I know their needs will almost always be different. I need another set of arms. Babywearing is such a great thing, but they do get to a point where they want to be down moving around on their own more. So whatever brilliant solution you come up with in the next day or two, let me know! :)

[Summer]

That's one of my big worries when #3 is born. I'm already torn in two, I might split trying to keep up with 3.

[Noble Savage]

I know exactly how you feel. This is a very apt description.

[christy]

Some things get easier and some things get harder. I have a 2 year old and an 8 year old. It's hard to keep them both entertained at the same time! I know how you feel!

[Carla]

I know what you mean (with a 7 and 3 year old)! It does get easier, though--you develop more of a balance.

By the way, I love your site look changes!

[phdinparenting]

@ Carla - Thanks! There may be more design changes to come....I like the 3 column, but I'm having some formatting challenges that I need to fix.

[Dating your kids: Highly recom]

[...] of them want the same toy at the same time. They both want a snack and they both want it first. One is slow, the other is fast. They don’t understand the meaning of “in a minute” or “when I’m done [...]

[Kelly]

Ha! Tell me about it! I have a 5 month old and a 26 month old. I'm holding onto these days with all my might. Soon my little baby will want to explore the world and want to have a say. I am completely unprepared for that. Right now, things are great though.

Any advice for allowing a small baby to crawl around and explore in a small house with a toddler playing boisterous games in the same space? I'm so scared of that day!

[Kristen @ Adventures in Mommyh]

Ah I can definitely relate! My son will be one in March and my daughter is 3 1/2. I feel pulled in two directions all the time!

Thanks for sharing this on fb today. I've been struggling as a mom of two lately and it's nice to know we all feel that way sometimes, or even often.

[Sara]

thanks for a glimpse into what my life will be like in a year or so...baby #2 is due in April!